10 Things I've Learned about the Timberwolves from the NBA Legend Facebook game

NBA Legend is basically like Farmville with dribbling avatars and an NBA license instead of cows and fields. It's pretty fun, although half of the charge I'm getting from it is from seeing how the NBA sees itself--that is, how it uses game mechanics as a subliminal commentary on the 'real life' game. Plus, it is a soothing balm where I can see a Timberwolves logo and not crawl into the fetal position. Because it is a game, my Timberwolves team is not crippled with national ridicule, an abject front office and near total fan apathy. It's all good! There are, however, a few things that might be worth passing on, below the jump.




1. I, in fact, forgot to name my character/avatar something like Cap Space or my Canis handle, so in honor of the pure fantasy that this game is from a Timberwolves perspective, I named my shooting guard my character name from Neverwinter Nights. And we're off.

2. Unfortunately, as kind of a downer, Kurt Rambis shows up for certain missions involving drills, practice, game "strategy" etc. Noooooo... As far as I could tell there was no "Bench Me!" button or awkward substitution metric that I could find. I'm still pretty new to the game but i will keep looking.

3. In this game Johnny Flynn has better stats than Luke Ridnour. That is to say, in this game, he is more valuable in helping your team actually win games. And he is a higher level of unlockable, which means that some game programmer decided that he was a higher level of  "reward" on the Timberwolves team. Letting that sink in, let's move on.

4. There is a taunting mechanic! You can go on friends' courts and taunt them and "steal their chemistry." Apparently having a player blink their eyes at a ref is worth a technical but taunting by imaginary fans is a-ok.. (Also, for one of the missions there is this guy named Marvin. Marvin is a PASSIONATE TIMBERWOLVES FAN and he is begging you to taunt a friend. But, NBA Cares, right?

5. Kahn has not made an appearance. I'm just filled with relief from that. I don't have anything really else to say.

6. Darko is an even higher level unlockable. No indication yet if there's a manna stat boost in game. 

7. The only old-school Wolf they have is Garnett. I hope they rectify this. Googs and Starbury circa 1998 would be fun.

8. I have a regular season record of 6-1 so far to start the season! It's weird in that there seems to be a level playing field between all of the teams, and no machinations by either players or the league to collect all the power of the league into 5 or 6 teams and ignore the rest. This is truly a utopia.

9. Unfortunately it's one of those games that requires annoying status updates and friends helping you out to get anywhere. This is its great downfall. Since none of my other friends really have this morbid hobby of being a Timberwolves fan, I really feel bad about bothering them. From my perspective I am not a fan of when someone is asking me for some help with iron-wrought fencing for their virtual farm--so why would I want to do the same about some stupid perimeter defense drill co-op (although if I could EVER translate any of that perimeter defense to the real life Wolves...but I digress). 

10. Fully expecting the game to be locked out in a couple of months anyway. My little Timberwolves home gym will be empty, except for the occasional virtual Disney on Ice show and Tom Petty concert.

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