Timberwolves vs Denver Nuggets Card 2/20/12
by Anthony Real Thing on Feb 21, 2012 1:36 PM CST
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PrintHi guys,
Holy shit! before any introduction to the report card, let me please say it loud: MARTELL, HOW DUMB CAN YOU GET?. What? Do you want it a bit louder? MARTELL, YOU SUCK!!!!! TO BE HONEST, YOUR LAST PLAY IS THE MOST STUPIDEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.
Being said this, just to tell of you that I finally got enough confidence to take a Report Card despite my youth. Today is my birthday (thirty years old guys) so I couldn't imagine a better gift that a win to the Nuggets and the eighth position! I also was honored with the first overtime of the season. Instead of that, I feel miserable and now I hate my CH friend "Dogpile" for this little favour with the Report Card...%.
Anyway, you guys deserve not a stupid tale but the most accurate review of the game. Thus, please take into account the following for the upcoming lines:
I'm from the Old Europe and I acknowledge I never watched a game of the Wolves before this year. Thus, I'm merely an outsider in CH. And I say I'm an outsider, yes, because I like the metaphor of CH being a beautiful Inn near Minnesota in which I lately feel very comfortable sharing all the mixed emotions of the new Wolves adventure.
Yes, I have mixed emotions at this time. As a general picture, these Wolves are awesome when facing powerful franchises but I live in a constant dread of being hurt when we face low-range teams. I should get a J&B bottle before these games to calm down my nerves. Unfortunately, this game was one of them I really want to forget asap.
One night you find them playing like an angels but without wings (maybe the Unicorn has a couple hidden but I still haven't noticed any feather swirling around the court). The next night, in a back-to-back ,there is such a mess in the court that you find yourself asking too many questions which seem to remain unresolved. Is really Wes destiny to play basketball? Is it true that Darko was the second pick in a draft? Can Ridnour dribble around a defender or only around his mouth? (this is a European joke, though) Did Webster take part in the last training or he used that time to visit his fuckxx hairstylist? Why are we leading the NBA in beards and not in airballs and turnovers?. Well, you know, we are actually toeing the line between nerds and losers (CH stated it before).
Anyway, it was only afterwards ( in the middle of the night) that I realized I'm optimistic with this team and regardless of how they play one night, there are players (our Big-Three) who have undoubtedly the most important distinctive of a winner team, they don't give up any game. There is an exciting future for the Wolves around these players. Yes, I believe in that ( I'm pretty sure I'm not the only in our CH roster, despite this awful game). We only need Kahn to understand that we need a true SG instead of the smiling craps who are Wes or Martell.
OK, I'll go through the test with the degrees of this game but you know how maddening is to do this right now. So I will use another metaphor for the degrees. Sure you all know what is a "Leitmotif". It's a musical term (though occasionally used in theatre or literature) which refers to a recurring theme, associated with a particular person, place, or idea. We say that theme is the Wolves playing a game like a team (Wikipedia said).
In particular, such a theme should be clearly identified so as to retain its identify if modified on subsequent appearances' whether such modification be in terms of rhythm, harmony, orchestration and accompaniment.
What is this when we talk about basketball? OK, when we play like a team, the music sounds smoothly and fluently and we have Beethoven, Wagner or Mozart playing in there. When we play inconsistently, defense is shining because of its absence, and the offense plan is just running like a chicken in a coop , the music stops its charming song and starts sounding as holy shit, then you try your ears to get blocked or you find yourself kicking your head to the wall.
Thus, the degrees go in accordance with the contribution of each player to the game, taking the intangibles. Well, as you noted that before, I'm talking in terms of rhythm, harmony, orchestration and accompaniment. Besides, the stats will also play a factor in my assessment:
TEAM: 36,4% FGM-A (36-99); 22,2% 3PM-A (6-27); 23-24 FTM-A; 50 Reb to 57 Reb; 15 TO to 16 TO. OVERALL GRADE: D within the Leitmotif. The music screeched to a halt.
SpreadtheLove - 47 min, 22 pts on 7/22 FG, 1/4 3PM, 7/7 FT, 13 Reb, 4 Ast, 2 Ste and 4 TO: Grade: C
Rhythm: He tried to get into the game, but he lost his position with a rookie. He was gassed.
Harmony: The music should start with RR and end with KL. But KL did not hit the shots the All-Star should made.
Orchestration: Made all of his 7 FT but 7 on 22 shots are very very poorly.
Accompaniment: None. We needed him to get hot and lead the team but that didn't happen.
Rubicop - 40 min, 16 pts on 5/16 FG, 2/4 3PM 4/4 FT, 5 Reb, 5 Ast, 3 ST and 5 TO: GRADE: C
Rhythm: He did his usual. Not brilliant but 5 TO are still too much.
Harmony: May I say RR has one of the poor stats of the league in FG?.
Orchestration: Good ball movement.
Accompaniment: None. As this time, I believe we can ask him for more effort and energy.
SuperPek - 15 min, 7 pts, 3/10 FG, 1/1 FT , 7 Reb,1 Ast, and 0 TO: GRADE: B
Rhythm: He looks good until he got injured in the game with a sprained ankle. This is really bad news for the T-Wolves.
Harmony: 7 rebounds in 15 minutes and he was the only one who could guard Faried. He did well in the first quarter.
Orchestration: What? Are u kidding me? A monster is a monster.
Accompaniment: He is a master with the offensive rebounds. Once he left, we missed him so so much.
Rid..dle - 28 min, 12 pts, 5/10 FG, 0/2 3PM, 2/2 FT, 4 Reb, 0 Ast and 1 TO. GRADE: C
Rhythm: Rid is a mystery for me. If he is hot, he looks amazing from beyond the arc. If not, he looks terrible whatever he do, passing, shooting and his defense is....no words for that.
Harmony: Stop pretending to be RR.
Orchestration: Rid sucks so hard in this aspect. I don't like him neither a SG nor a PG.
Accompaniment: Inconsistency, as always.
Wesley: 18 min 4 points, 1/3 FG, 0/2 3PM, 2/2 FT, 1 Ast and 1 St. GRADE: F
Rhythm:None.
Harmony: Beyond horrible.
Orchestration: Is he really a basketball player?. I doubt it
Accompaniment: 3 FG attemps in 18 minutes. His defense was under the usual thing. Why RA still put him in the starting lineup?. Amazing.
JJ Barea – 14 min 6 pts 2/7 FG, 0/4 3PM, 3 Reb, 1 Ast and 1 TO. Grade: F
Rhythm: I don't like this guy. I don't like the way he moves around the court. I don't like him running up and down.
Harmony: JJ messing up the game.
Orchestration: Did I not say it before?. JJ Chicken.
Accompaniment: He disappeared in the last half. If not, we didn't even reached to the OT.
Little Lion- 22 min, 5 pts, 2/2 FG, 1/1 FT, 4 Reb, 1 Ast. Grade: F
Rhythm: None.
Harmony: This guy should play in the D-league.
Orchestration: Even with the zone, he looks lost. One note for RA; the zone sucks in the NBA. It never never works.
Accompaniment: Whaaaat? The lion looked like a rabbit surrounded by wolves.
B-easy - 33 Min, 17 pts 7/16 FG, 1/2 FT, 2/3 3PM, 7 Reb, 1 Ast. Grade: B
Rhythm: He actually fits well doing as the sixth man. The best player of the wolves against the Nuggets.
Harmony: Why KL or RR did not pass him in the last quarter and the OT? He was hottest than the others.
Orchestration: One play. There was one play Beasly passed the ball to RR. It deserves a good note!.
Accompaniment: 7/16 FG and 2/3 from beyond the arc. As the sixth man, I believe it was the best performance.
Webster - 31 min, 10 pts 3-10 FG, 1/6 3PM, 3/3 FT, 4 Reb 1ast, 1 Steals, 3 TO
Rhythm: I don't want to talk about this guy. I let you guys spread the word around the world.
Harmony: I don't want to talk about this guy. I let you guys spread the word around the world.
Orchestration: I don't want to talk about this guy. I let you guys spread the word around the world.
Accompaniment: I don't want to talk about this guy. I let you guys spread the word around the world.
Tolliver and Miller fall are out of scope of this report. Their game didn't have any influence at all.
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Comments
Little Lion - hahahahaha
I’ve been thinking we should go from C-Lion to C-Hamster. He strikes me as more hamster-like when uncaged lately.
"It's tough to make predictions, especially about the future." -- Yogi Berra
Some tough love in this report card
But it is warranted. This game was played poorly in pretty much every possible way. We had a 14 point lead in the first half, and squandered it to a 5 point deficit in a matter of a couple of minutes. I blame RA for that. You can’t keep pulling out your starting rotation all at once and then keep them on the bench for most of a quarter while the game falls apart. After a 10-0 Denver run, you gotta tell Love and Rubio to get back on the floor.
I also totally agree about JJ. He sucks. I thought he was going to be a great leader and addition to the team. But all he does is interrupt the flow of the game. As soon as he gets the ball there are really only three options – he lowers his head and torpedoes himself into an army of 7 footers (sometimes he scores i guess, but every time he pisses me off), he immediately turns the ball over (his favorite method is the 75 foot touchdown pass to no one), or he just says screw it and tosses up a 30 footer. Seriously, why is he always trying to push the pace in transition? We don’t have any players on our team that are good in transition. Slow down and play the half court.
Agreed
but we have Wes. He is not bad in transition:)
Fun read.
And an interesting way to frame the grades. The Pek injury depressed me enough that I really didn’t even want to read the game thread. I did anyway, though. I just hope he isn’t hurt too badly.
I'm going to brag. I drive the Nikola Pekovic fanwagon.
The Leitmotif, Rhythm, Harmony, Orchestration, Accompaniment framing is fun.
Rubio: Concertmaster.
Ridnour: Second violin. You never know how much you need a real viola until there aren’t any around.
Wesley Johnson: Air guitar. He really looks good jammin’, but it makes no sound.
Love: Cello and brass section. His game combines odd, usually separate qualities. As a cello he carries the melody, and the brass comes in for emphasis at the right times.
Pekovic: String bass. They can’t do everything, but the things they do make an impact. Also, they are large.
(Martell Webster: French horn. French horns, so often, have sudden entrances, and it’s hard to be in tune for those.)
The last thing we want to do is take long twos. It's still on our list, though.
by feral on Feb 22, 2012 9:23 AM CST up reply actions 6 recs
Awesome
Beasley: Electric guitar. Trying to play the solo from Freebird in the middle of Beethoven’s 5th
Randolph: Noodling around with a drum set and an old wash tub. Sounds kinda cool but no one really knows what he’s doing.
"It's tough to make predictions, especially about the future." -- Yogi Berra
by Wile E Coyote on Feb 22, 2012 1:23 PM CST up reply actions 5 recs
These two posts are the greatest things I've seen all week.
I'm going to brag. I drive the Nikola Pekovic fanwagon.
by Cynical Jason on Feb 22, 2012 4:48 PM CST up reply actions
Webster screwed up
But blaming the loss on that F up is silly. Even he did the right thing and pull up for 3, it still would have had to go in and the Wolves would have had to win the second OT. His missed wide open threes earlier in the game, as well as Lukes blown layup late and Loves inability to control the boards were all far more damaging than that final mistake.
by MoreJuice on Feb 21, 2012 3:14 PM CST reply actions 5 recs
I'm with you that you can't blame the WHOLE loss on him
But that situation showed his situational awareness and how he had no idea what the hell he was doing during a crucial moment of an NBA game. He probably misses it anyways but at least it could’ve gone in.
by Doug West Domination!!! on Feb 21, 2012 10:05 PM CST up reply actions
I'm with both of you
He obviously wasn’t thinking about the time and score but I don’t think the play was THAT bad. Would we have had a better chance to tie it up if he shot a three or kicked it out, probably. The real mistake was if he takes it in he needs to draw contact. Brewer was cutting across so what he needed to do was first make contact with Brewer, force the refs to call a foul, and then finish.
Nice report
I personally enjoy hearing the point of views of international Wolves fans. It’s quite endearing to hear the love you guys have for this squad, because here in the US, they haven’t been loved the same way (outside of Minnesota of course). It’s a really interesting take. Anyway, to the game.
I don’t know whether to be mad at Martell, or feel bad for him. He was just trying to get a basket. Dumb play, but it’s not like he fumbled in the Super Bowl. He’ll survive, we’ll survive and he’ll keep playing hard, but DAMN!
I shouldn’t blame Webster though, we had this game in the bag. It’s baffling that our defense can be so tough on some possessions and then other possessions it’s like we’re not even paying attention. Tough loss to swallow last night.
By the way.. any word on Pek’s ankle?
Only thing I disagree with is the Williams D-League comment...
He’s far too good, Gerald Green has been tearing up the DLeague and I gotta think DWill is better than him.
Beasley sucks
When Beasley is on the court the D looks like it did most of last year. He is completely at a loss and makes his teammates look bad.
Young Wolves eventually grow into a ferocious pack!
by Achilles Fang 1 on Feb 21, 2012 4:02 PM CST via mobile reply actions
I see you did not
mention ridnour’s choke job that preceded websters choke job. Cant believe Ridnour missed the open layup, and i still cant believe Webster dunked it.
I have a feeling Webster
is going to start playing much better after that stupid play. Hopefully he realizes that he needs to play well for this team to succeed, and he starts to play his game. He, and guards in general, has been pretty terrible for us when all he does is throw up 3s. Our 2s and 3s need to make contributions especially on rebounding. They need to start crashing the boards because twolves are giving up way too many 2nd chance points. They also need to start playing the game of NBA 2s and 3s… They just need to do something other than shoot 3s as nba players.
Ricky-15 apg
I’m sick of seeing Ricky’s face after a great pass, see a missed shot, only with Navarro, we would be in playoff
ART, glad I talked you into doing this,
I love the interesting spin on grading the team.! It does make sense to look at the whole of the performance and break down the individual contributions to that overall goal. You write well and express yourself confidently in a second language, kudos for a very nice writeup!
It is a damn shame that the Pups couldn’t pull this one out, it seemed as if they lost their confidence once Pek had to sit. I thought that Adelman was way too slow to respond once Denver got on a run. I thought AR might have been a good substitution along with Beas and DWill to space the court and generate some offense out of the second unit, but he seems to be at the end of the bench in RAs roster….
I hope to do some small amount of a good followup tomorrow after sticking you with a tough assignment last night!
Ricky is lobbing at an Ooptimal level!
Nice report!
Why is this card not on the hoopus front page? It took me a while to find it.
by rickyrules on Feb 21, 2012 7:37 PM CST reply actions 2 recs
This was such a fun write up ART. I laughed out loud on several occasions..
I love the leifmotif concept. It’s incredibly unique. You are a tough grader my friend, but understandably so after this game. Thank you for this write up and HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. Now that you are 30 you will find that you ache in ways you did not feel possible. I am now 36 and I have incurred more weightlifting injuries (I have been an avid weightlifter since I was 16) in this last year than I have in my entire life. Let us pretend our lives are just beginning and that we are like babes in our mothers’ wombs. Why is it so wet in here?
forgive me my intrusion, but this is the updated report card list. Please signup if you would like.
2/22 Utah – already taken by Dogpile
2-23-2/27 – MIDTERM REPORT CARD TO BE WRITTEN BY MALASTARE
2/28 LA Clippers – already taken by Timberwolf in LA
2/29 LA Lakers – already taken by MAYNHOLUP
3/1 Phoenix – already taken by T-Fear
3/3 Portland – already taken by Cynical Jason
3/5 LA Clippers – already taken by Bob McFlallergy
3/7 Portland – already taken by Matt Leisen
3/9 LA Lakers – already taken by Jones The Cat
3/10 New Orleans – OPEN
3/12 Phoenix – already taken by last of the Irish wolves
3/15 Utah – OPEN
3/16 LA Lakers – already taken by bringbackbrewer
3/18 Sacramento – OPEN
Can I have N'Awlins on the tenth?
I’m sure I can watch that one.
T'Wolves 2012: My Kingdom For A Wing
Thanks for the report card.
Life gets better after 30. Really. Happy Birthday.
It was painful watching Tolliver last night thanks for not grading him. I was scared on his behalf.
Thirty didn't freak me out,
but for some reason 31 did. Forty didn’t freak me out either. We’ll see what 42 does to me this year. It is the Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything, so I have that going for me.
I'm going to brag. I drive the Nikola Pekovic fanwagon.
by Cynical Jason on Feb 21, 2012 8:58 PM CST up reply actions
I thought I was unfreakable
Until “how the hell did this happen 60?” But I think age has brought peacefulness and tolerance. Kari Miller was asking Margo Timmons about looking back at her youthful, newly successful self and she said “Well I’d love to be back in that skin, but I wouldn’t want to be back in that headspace.” I thought that was rather profound. As long as one feels that way I think he or she is getting somewhere other than nearer the end.
"pokin' the animals at the Canis Hoopus zoo"
by pastyearsears on Feb 21, 2012 10:15 PM CST up reply actions
I remember 29 freaking me out.
Like suddenly 30 was right around the corner. So far 39 has been smooth sailin’.
I appreciate the creative review.
Well done.
Thank goodness for the AllStar break soon. We all need it.
by fanslaststand on Feb 21, 2012 9:29 PM CST via mobile reply actions
I really don't like Barrea anymore, he takes bad bad bad shots.
But this game was a “Hack a Fest” to say the least. I could’ve counted 20 fouls that weren’t called.
A couple of notes
1. Can K-Love shut the F*** UP stop crying and just get back on D and stop grabbing at your neck every 2 seconds so we feel bad about the scratch. I’ve had worse at the Y. I still like your game but your maturity sucks.
2. Serioulsy Barrea takes bad shots and we squandered the lead when he took over point.
3. If you can’t guard Al Harrington whats the point of even having a wing?
by Doug West Domination!!! on Feb 21, 2012 10:08 PM CST reply actions
I think too many of our players look to the refs when they don't get the call they want..
and it’s hurting our transition defense. I concur with everything else you said as well except I don’t dislike Barea as much as some CHers, at least not yet.
Of course after writing this
He scores 22 points to shut me up. Damn you Barrea.
by Doug West Domination!!! on Feb 22, 2012 11:36 PM CST up reply actions
I was cursing him in the first half
and praising him in the second half. Such a weird game.
I'm going to brag. I drive the Nikola Pekovic fanwagon.
by Cynical Jason on Feb 23, 2012 3:37 PM CST up reply actions
correct statistics
How is it that ridnour had 6 assists and you report that he had 0
sometimes things don't get transcribed well.... having done many of these report cards
I can tell you the numbers can run together, and it’s not difficult to make a mistake. I appreciate you pointing out the error, but I’m hoping the rest of this great write up wasn’t lost on you because you fixated on this mistake.
fixation?
I am assuming that the person that wrote this article watched the game, and did not notice or have a awareness of any of ridnours 6 assists.hard to believe.
That was different, and entertaining
I always like some musical references. When things are going badly we are like Pek’s favourite group, Beogradski Sindikat. You owe it to yourselves to listen to the epic terribleness of Pek’s Serbian hip hop collective….
T'Wolves 2012: Where Pek Decimates Jason Thompson
Happy birthday by the way
If it makes you feel better, I am not yet thirty and yesterday I was playing pick up and tried to dunk on an eight foot rim and missed and jarred my back out.
T'Wolves 2012: Where Pek Decimates Jason Thompson
by Malastare on Feb 22, 2012 5:27 AM CST up reply actions 1 recs
I'm glad I didn't watch the ending of this one.
real life intervened and combined with the depressing second quarter I figured we were toast.
Howdy fellas
I am so sorry for my mistake with the Ridnaur stats. Hope to make a better one next time!! Go Wolves!!!!!
by Anthony Real Thing on Feb 22, 2012 8:04 AM CST reply actions
Don't even think about it.
Getting the game stats is very easy via a wide variety of sources. I’m pretty sure player stat lines is not why so many people from all corners of the world visit Canis Hoopus. Your report card was well done.
by SlowBreak on Feb 22, 2012 8:09 AM CST up reply actions 3 recs
Rec for truth.
T'Wolves 2012: My Kingdom For A Wing
by Malastare on Feb 22, 2012 8:36 AM CST up reply actions 1 recs
Good job!!!
If I'm pissing you off its probably sarcasm
by CoffeeJanitor on Feb 22, 2012 9:23 AM CST up reply actions
Great recap.
On the Ridnour´s stat thing, you should have said: “This is the guy who tried to kill my dad.” That covers anything there ;)
Williams played good
No turnovers, no fouls, made all his shots, grabbed 4 boards, 1 assist and 2 blocks in 22 minutes. He had low usage, but was efficient. Great game by him, if only a bit too passive. But he was stuck out there with Barea, so it’s hard to get many touches.
He could’ve played one on one D a bit better too, but not bad.
I’d give him a B+ at least.
This report card was a thing of beauty. However, I don’t get the Williams-hate by some on CH. I think he’s played rather well, in terms of my expectations with him. However, he just isn’t getting the time needed for a young player. Maybe he’s not impressing in practice, but in games, he’s hitting the boards hard, getting to the rim, and moving the ball well. The things he’s struggled at, namely, defense, outside shooting, and general mental errors, can and will be cut down by consistent minutes, in my opinion. UNCAGE THE LION!
I really, really hope he could somehow transfer to the three
Cause he is definitely a legit talent.
If I'm pissing you off its probably sarcasm
by CoffeeJanitor on Feb 22, 2012 3:52 PM CST up reply actions
Exquisite musical theme ART
This well written piece was a joy to read, sadly there was no joy in watching this train wreck of Woves game… Understandable outcome losing Pek, and playing b/t/b games in the mile high city, but… Wesley grows more bust-like with every passing game, Barrea, Ridnour might be tradable assets when coupled with Williams before the deadline… I’m shocked this team hasn’t dipped into the D-league for a 2 or 3 because we have NADA! Congrats and thanks for your harsh grades on a putrid performance, but what grade would you attach to the Coach?
"There are nights when the wolves are silent, and only the moon howls". Carlin
by Patrick Daniels on Feb 22, 2012 2:53 PM CST reply actions
Rick Adelman
Hi buddy, following the leitmotif theme, I suppose RA is the conductor of the Orchestra “Wolves in motion” . We all know he is great, we all know he has recorded the fifth or sixth most wins among active NBA coaches so we have high expectations as the conductor. We can expect a work of art from him, but as all the things in this life, he needs time to polish up some details in the team. This is why I actually find this tough loss as something useful for RA. He will move the bartender out of the theater whereas he show his musicians how to play confidently and, this is the most important. how to work as a team. RA know this is the only way to the success, not in the NBA, but i all team-sports.
So the grade for RA is obviously the overall grade of the team: “D”. This means he needs to improve the way to teach the players more faster or we’ll see another PO without the Wolves hunting any pray in the League.
by Anthony Real Thing on Feb 22, 2012 3:35 PM CST up reply actions
Decent Report Card
But Tolliver had much more of an impact than you give him credit for. He played awful. His +/- was -17 in 9 minutes! No one else was even close to that bad. In fact all of the starters were positive except Ridnour who was -3.
Tolliver may be a good locker room presence, but he’s become a huge liability on the floor and should never play.
updated report card list
2/22 Utah – already taken by Dogpile
2-23-2/27 – MIDTERM REPORT CARD TO BE WRITTEN BY MALASTARE
2/28 LA Clippers – already taken by Timberwolf in LA
2/29 LA Lakers – already taken by MAYNHOLUP
3/1 Phoenix – already taken by T-Fear
3/3 Portland – already taken by Cynical Jason
3/5 LA Clippers – already taken by Bob McFlallergy
3/7 Portland – already taken by Matt Leisen
3/9 LA Lakers – already taken by Jones The Cat
3/10 New Orleans – already taken by Malastare
3/12 Phoenix – already taken by last of the Irish wolves
3/15 Utah – already taken by Koberdoit
3/16 LA Lakers – already taken by bringbackbrewer
3/18 Sacramento – already taken by LoveTo
It's filled!
Now get to work scheduling the dates after that! Hehe.
I'm going to brag. I drive the Nikola Pekovic fanwagon.
by Cynical Jason on Feb 22, 2012 6:46 PM CST up reply actions
success!
If I'm pissing you off its probably sarcasm
by CoffeeJanitor on Feb 23, 2012 9:11 PM CST up reply actions
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