For those not faithfully reading every comment in every post as well as those of you with impaired memories and/or poor notetaking skills, I blew through my monthly alotment of Verizon Homefusion™ bandwidth earlier this week when I caved and downloaded Apple's OS X Mavericks operating system. Because I did not realize it was a five gig download, Apple in its infinite and increasingly Microsoftian wisdom having not shared that information with me and hey, you would not believe how fast you can download 5+ GBs with a 20mbps connection (up to 30mbps if you catch a tailwind).
So I went old school. Not really old school, but old school within the context of the all too brief lives of most Canis Hoopus readers. I read the play by play on Yahoo. (Really old school would have meant waiting for the Sunday out-of-town edition of the Chicago Tribune or Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel and reading the boxscores. For the newer old school among you, those are daily newspapers, a concept you may not be familiar with unless you help take out your grandparents' recycling for them.)
Tim's Eric in Madison's excellent post-game wrap-up, I have to say that the game was as bad to read as it was to watch. Which is not to say that I didn't get sucked in when we kinda, sorta almost practically rallied in the fourth quarter. I even turned on the game stream with less than two minutes left. 12MB later I shut it off after seeing zero action other than the refs taking three minutes to scratch their balls by the scorer's table watching the replay of a JJ Barea three-point near air ball. In the refs' defense, it was a really close call and the clock should not have been reset because c'mon! if you have to watch the replay to see if it touched the rim, the shot was not worthy of a shot clock reset. If you can't win, at least try to lose with some dignity.
Which of course also did not happen. The dignity thing, I mean. We lost to a team with players whose names I can't spell without looking them up which would take way too much effort. A post-game post wrap-up wrap up is the essence of blogging and it would break all the rules if I did any research or put any serious thought into this. Seriously, and by seriously I mean there are rules to blogging the most important of which is that you get to make them up as you go and I just did so there.
Back to the game.
OK, having given it some thought, no, let's not go back to the game. Or the season or this team. It's time to look in the mirror folks. Either we are individually and collectively NBA fans, or we are Wolves fans. I no longer think you can be both. Trying makes your head hurt. Not trying makes you a Wolves fan by default.
To woof, or not to woof. Weather is cold and we suffer the ice and snow of polar vortexes, or take up remote controls against a sea of JJ threes and by changing the channel, end them? To choke: to tank; no more; and by a tank to say we choke on the wasted timeouts that Adelman is heir to; tis a trend devoutly to be wish'd the fuck over with.
Yea verily and henceforth, to wit. Enough is enough. Perchance to dream, ay, and maybe rub one off. T'would be a better use of time and wrist than further theft from WShakes, the
'tard bard of Avon. No more to stand up and holler, too oft to have sat and swallered.
Aroint us no longer with this bukkake of fail.
Here ends my tail of whoa, enough, stop already.
# # #
Not to be continued.
OK, one more official's time out and then we're out of here.
NOTE FROM VERIZON: You have exceeded your monthly alotment of bandwidth. Please pay an additional $15 for each additional gigabyte of bandwidth consumed by your loser basketball team.