Sorry, Ricky. You've been cut.
While details about a new CBA - whenever it is agreed upon by the parties - will probably not reach us for some time, one of the rumored aspects of the deal is an amnesty clause that allows each team to cut a player of its choosing without any salary cap penalty.
The obvious question becomes: What player will each team decide to cut using its amnesty clause?
There are some obvious choices like Gilbert Arenas, Rashard Lewis, Baron Davis and Brandon Roy who could become cut by their teams. Others like Joe Johnson and David Lee, who still have a lot of talent but are considerably overpaid, could be targets.
The Minnesota Timberwolves do not have any terrible contracts, at least not on the level of an Arenas. Their highest paid player is Michael Beasley at a little over $6 million. If the Wolves' choose to use their amnesty cut, what player makes the most sense?
Michael Beasley
Reasons for:
- Inefficient scorer and poor defender who may have peaked as a player
- Get him away from friends who keep placing bags of weed in his car
- Additional savings by no longer having to buy cases of Skittles for the locker room
Reasons against:
- Calling him "Melo-Lite" still feels great, even if it might not be the least bit true
- No more Beasley All-Star Classics in Minnesota, featuring players like Chris Paul Ronnie Price, Amar'e Stoudemire Pops Mensah-Bonsu, Steve Nash Tim Westbrook and Dwight Howard Daniel Orton
Martell Webster
Reasons for:
- Injury prone with bad back
- Not enough of an upgrade over Ryan Gomes
Reasons against:
- Possibly our third best player when healthy
- He understands the concept of 'defense' and how to play it
- He's only two years older than Wesley Johnson (copyright: PoorDick)
Darko Milicic
Reasons for:
- He doesn't like us
- We don't like him
- Just leave already
Reasons against:
- The catchy "DARKO...DARKO" thing that fans say during Wolves' games
- He's a friend for Nikola Pekovic and may be the only who can keep Pek from killing everyone in the locker room and adding their skulls to his tattoo pile
Brad Miller
Reasons for:
- He just had microfracture knee surgery
- He's old even for a guy who didn't just have microfracture knee surgery
- He hasn't played for us yet, so there is less attachment
Reasons against:
- Umm...
- Might need some help on this one...
- He's not Darko Milicic?
Kevin Love
Reasons for:
- It would give Bill Simmons three more years worth of "KAAAAAAAHNNNNNN" jokes
- It would add to David Kahn's reputation as a "quirky and unorthodox" Vice President of Basketball Operations
- Canis Hoopus might receive the most amount of traffic ever from angry T'Wolves fans
Reasons against:
- He's our best player
- He's the only Wolf besides Ricky Rubio who is ever in the news for something positive
- 20% discounts on Beach Boys albums through iTunes
Nikola Pekovic
Reasons for:
- He fouls way too much
- He still doesn't understand what just happened when they call a defensive three second violation
- Represents the "old regime" of Kevin McHale
Reasons against:
- DeMarcus Cousins is scared of him
- No one will volunteer to tell him that he's been cut
Wesley Johnson
Reasons for:
- Too old and unlikely to turn into an above-average player at this point
- He'll likely be injured due to the Second Year Curse anyway
- He played at Syracuse University
Reasons against:
- AARP discounts at restaurants and hotels on road trips
- He provides at least half of PoorDick's material
- If he develops a handle and gets more consistent on defense and becomes more aggressive and builds an all-around offensive game...he could be a quality starting forward for a fringe playoff team
Luke Ridnour
Reasons for:
- Outside of Darko and Ricky Rubio, Ridnour has the longest contract on the Wolves
- He is a decent backup point guard, but is a poor starting point guard
- With Rubio here, he will not get the minutes he needs to justify that amount of money
Reasons against:
- He is a genuinely good human being
- It is nice to still have at least one Wolves player shorter than I am
- Does not understand the concept of a 'fast break'
Ricky Rubio
Reasons for:
- Posting and Toasting would have at least 23 new FanPosts about signing him as a free agent
- He would never have to experience a Minnesota winter and then leave us because it is too cold, which analysts have been predicting will happen
- Twin Cities' area high school women's basketball teams will not have to face Ricky Rubio's sister
Reasons against:
- We just signed him after a lengthy buyout process
- He was a lottery pick only two years ago and is still only 20 years old
- State cannot afford the extra security for David Kahn if he ever made this move
Anthony Randolph
Reasons for:
- Raw talent who has never really contributed much in the NBA
- It would spawn at least 16 more Canis Hoopus posts debating whether Randolph is overrated, underrated or properly rated
Reasons against:
- He is paid relatively little
- He still has some potential
- Remember when he scored 30 against Dallas that one time?
Wayne Ellington
Reasons for:
- Statistically, he was one of the worst players in the league last year
- He's a fairly inconsistent shooter, given that shooting is his best skill
- He will likely never be more than a rotation player at best
Reasons against:
- His girlfriend is pretty hot
- Seriously, have you seen the pictures online?
- She must be like a model or something
Lazar Hayward
Reasons for:
- Getting first-round pick money, despite being second-round pick level talent
- Probably best suited for playing in the D-League
- Does not stand out in any area of the game
Reasons against:
- He works hard in practice
- Kurt Rambis liked him enough never to play him
- He went to Marquette